Being a Parent of a Musical Child - Part 9: Presence and Presentation

This​ ​may​ ​come​ ​as​ ​quite​ ​a​ ​shock​ ​to​ ​you,​ ​so​ ​brace​ ​yourself...

Performance isn’t easy.

Hard​ ​to​ ​believe,​ ​right?​ ​Okay,​ ​all​ ​joking​ ​aside,​ ​the​ ​anticipation​ ​and/or​ ​aftermath​ ​of​ ​a​ ​performance has​ ​left​ ​many​ ​a​ ​musician​ ​a​ ​quivering​ ​bundle​ ​of​ ​nerves.​ ​That​ ​‘deer​ ​in​ ​the​ ​headlights’​ ​feeling​ ​can lead​ ​to​ ​performances​ ​that​ ​are​ ​wooden,​ ​stiff,​ ​or​ ​sleepy.

It​ ​should​ ​be​ ​said​ ​that​ ​performing​ ​in​ ​front​ ​of​ ​any​ ​size​ ​of​ ​an​ ​audience​ ​still​ ​qualifies​ ​as​ ​a performance.​ ​Some​ ​musicians​ ​are​ ​equally​ ​nerve​ ​wracked​ ​when​ ​in​ ​a​ ​private​ ​lesson,​ ​or​ ​a​ ​group class,​ ​or​ ​even​ ​something​ ​as​ ​seemingly​ ​mundane​ ​as​ ​practicing​ ​where​ ​others​ ​can​ ​hear.​ ​Some are​ ​more​ ​poised​ ​as​ ​the​ ​size​ ​of​ ​the​ ​audience​ ​increases,​ ​or​ ​at​ ​least​ ​appear​ ​to​ ​be.​ ​Stage​ ​fright comes​ ​in​ ​a​ ​wide​ ​variety​ ​of​ ​flavors.

There​ ​are​ ​certainly​ ​a​ ​lot​ ​of​ ​ingredients​ ​that​ ​comprise​ ​a​ ​performance,​ ​but​ ​one​ ​factor​ ​stands​ ​head and​ ​shoulders​ ​above​ ​the​ ​rest…​ ​a​ ​musician​ ​has​ ​to​ ​connect​ ​with​ ​their​ ​audience.​ ​​ ​Without​ ​that, none​ ​of​ ​the​ ​other​ ​aspects​ ​of​ ​the​ ​performance​ ​will​ ​fall​ ​into​ ​place.​ ​This​ ​is​ ​where​ ​presence​ ​and presentation​ ​come​ ​into​ ​play.

Sometimes​ ​it​ ​can​ ​seem​ ​like​ ​a​ ​performer​ ​has​ ​a​ ​certain​ ​‘je​ ​ne​ ​sais​ ​quoi’,​ ​but​ ​stage​ ​presence​ ​isn’t something​ ​that​ ​anyone​ ​is​ ​born​ ​with.​ ​Mastering​ ​that​ ​presence​ ​takes​ ​a​ ​great​ ​deal​ ​of​ ​time​ ​and effort,​ ​with​ ​many​ ​successes​ ​and​ ​failures.​ ​A​ ​basic​ ​understanding​ ​of​ ​what​ ​exactly​ ​presence​ ​is​ ​will most​ ​certainly​ ​help​ ​your​ ​child​ ​to​ ​develop​ ​and​ ​evolve​ ​their​ ​presentation.​ ​Both​ ​concepts​ ​are​ ​just as​ ​essential​ ​to​ ​outstanding​ ​performances​ ​as​ ​your​ ​child’s​ ​skill​ ​set​ ​(the​ ​culmination​ ​of​ ​their learning​ ​and​ ​practice).

“As artists, we all have some level of narcissism. I mean, you’ve really got to have some screws loose to be in love with showing your most vulnerable side to millions of people and hoping that they’ll like you enough to pull out their wallets and pay money to witness your talent night after night. But it’s not about you anymore. In fact, you’re the last person who matters when you’re up on that stage. From the second that spotlight shines down on you, it’s all about your audience and how you make them feel.”

This​ ​may​ ​sound​ ​a​ ​bit​ ​callous,​ ​but​ ​it’s​ ​100%​ ​true.​ ​The​ ​journey​ ​to​ ​a​ ​performance​ ​(lessons, practice,​ ​writing​ ​and​ ​refining,​ ​etc.)​ ​is​ ​every​ ​bit​ ​about​ ​the​ ​artist.​ ​Once​ ​your​ ​young​ ​performer​ ​hits that​ ​stage​ ​the​ ​outline​ ​and​ ​rough​ ​draft​ ​that​ ​was​ ​their​ ​journey​ ​until​ ​then​ ​becomes​ ​their​ ​final,​ ​fully fleshed​ ​essay.​ ​Presence​ ​becomes​ ​the​ ​font,​ ​paper,​ ​and​ ​penmanship,​ ​while​ ​presentation becomes​ ​the​ ​delivery.​ ​It’s​ ​difficult​ ​to​ ​get​ ​out​ ​of​ ​one’s​ ​own​ ​head,​ ​but​ ​nervous​ ​energy​ ​can​ ​detract from​ ​even​ ​the​ ​most​ ​brilliantly​ ​written​ ​essay​ ​and​ ​cause​ ​an​ ​audience​ ​to​ ​fail​ ​to​ ​engage​ ​and​ ​relate. Musical performances are no different.​ ​It’s​ ​all​ ​about​ ​the​ ​audience;​ ​Without​ ​them,​ ​it’s​ ​just​ ​a practice​ ​session. Everyone​ ​has​ ​at​ ​least​ ​one​ ​thing​ ​they​ ​feel​ ​completely​ ​awkward​ ​doing.​ ​For​ ​example,​ ​if​ ​I​ ​am​ ​on​ ​a stage​ ​singing​ ​rather​ ​than​ ​playing​ ​drums​ ​I​ ​find​ ​I​ ​haven’t​ ​a​ ​clue​ ​what​ ​to​ ​do​ ​with​ ​my​ ​hands…​ ​but my​ ​hands​ ​are​ ​wanting​ ​to​ ​do​ ​​something regardless.​ ​The​ ​first​ ​time​ ​I​ ​experienced​ ​this​ ​I​ ​decided​ ​to make​ ​a​ ​list​ ​of​ ​things​ ​I​ ​could​ ​do​ ​with​ ​my​ ​hands,​ ​and​ ​I​ ​practiced​ ​those​ ​simple​ ​things​ ​regardless​ ​of how​ ​goofy​ ​it​ ​felt.​ ​The​ ​point​ ​is​ ​to​ ​feel​ ​silly​ ​and​ ​uncomfortable​ ​when​ ​practicing​ ​rather​ ​than​ ​while performing.​ ​Working​ ​on​ ​weaknesses​ ​behind​ ​the​ ​scenes​ ​will​ ​help​ ​a​ ​performer​ ​feel​ ​more​ ​natural when​ ​the​ ​whole​ ​world​ ​is​ ​watching,​ ​and​ ​that​ ​fierce,​ ​confident​ ​attitude​ ​will​ ​shine​ ​through​ ​and​ ​infect the​ ​audience,​ ​both​ ​of​ ​which​ ​greatly​ ​enhances​ ​the​ ​collective​ ​overall​ ​experience.

There​ ​is​ ​a​ ​school​ ​of​ ​thought​ ​that​ ​whatever​ ​drama​ ​you​ ​have​ ​going​ ​on​ ​should​ ​be​ ​left​ ​backstage.​ ​I agree​ ​with​ ​this,​ ​but​ ​only​ ​to​ ​a​ ​point.​ ​If​ ​your​ ​child​ ​is​ ​performing​ ​a​ ​piece​ ​that​ ​is​ ​meant​ ​to​ ​be melancholy​ ​while​ ​they​ ​themselves​ ​are​ ​feeling​ ​blue,​ ​the​ ​emotional​ ​component​ ​of​ ​the​ ​music​ ​won’t be​ ​served​ ​by​ ​‘putting​ ​on​ ​a​ ​happy​ ​face’.​ ​It​ ​takes​ ​a​ ​good​ ​deal​ ​of​ ​emotional​ ​maturity​ ​to​ ​be​ ​able​ ​to recognize​ ​and​ ​embrace​ ​the​ ​emotion​ ​of​ ​a​ ​musical​ ​piece,​ ​but​ ​it​ ​adds​ ​depth​ ​and​ ​fullness​ ​to​ ​a performance​ ​that​ ​is​ ​going​ ​to​ ​resonate​ ​well​ ​with​ ​the​ ​audience,​ ​facilitating​ ​that​ ​connection between​ ​artist​ ​and​ ​fans.

“So get out of your own way, remember you can never be too prepared, understand that the learning process never stops for a professional, and embrace the special opportunities you get as an artist to share your talents and gifts with the world!”

Students:​ ​​ ​practice​ ​like​ ​your​ ​life​ ​depends​ ​on​ ​it…​ ​but​ ​once​ ​you​ ​take​ ​that​ ​stage,​ ​let​ ​go​ ​of​ ​yourself. Infuse​ ​your​ ​essence​ ​into​ ​the​ ​vibe​ ​of​ ​the​ ​music.​ ​Celebrate​ ​the​ ​sentiments​ ​embedded​ ​in​ ​the words​ ​and​ ​notes,​ ​the​ ​ebb​ ​and​ ​flow.​ ​Get​ ​swept​ ​away​ ​and​ ​take​ ​your​ ​listeners​ ​with​ ​you.​ ​Your muscle​ ​memory​ ​will​ ​take​ ​care​ ​of​ ​you,​ ​while​ ​you​ ​take​ ​care​ ​of​ ​your​ ​audience.

#music #performance #student #teacherparent #presence #stage #concert